the day grace rained.

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yesterday, i wanted to feel loved. i wanted to know it in my bones. i wanted a sign that i was loved, that i was not forgotten, that a love bigger than me, a love bigger than my faults and wrongs and sin, existed. i wanted to bask in that love. i knew i was loved, but i wanted my belovedness to be tangible, to feel it the same way i feel drops on my forehead when it rains.

i wanted to know that the grace that i’ve read about so much, the grace that makes me new, the grace that casted all my sins to the sea, the grace that belongs to me but i am so reluctant to receive, was real.

and because i don’t know how to express myself in any other way, i wrote a poem:

romance me,
speak to me.
tell me You love me
with the rise of the sun,
kiss my forehead with raindrops
and place a crown of life
and flowers upon my head.
whisper to me,
sing over me,
write in my heart
the words my soul
longs to hear.
tell me of
the love You have for me,
the love that cannot be
broken, the love greater
than heights and depths
and heaven and earth,
the love that makes me
your beloved.

i boldly asked for raindrops to kiss my forehead. and it rained, and it didn’t stop raining until evening. and those millions of drops fell from the sky into my heart, healing my brokenness, removing my unbelief, making me new, reminding me that i am seen and treasured and beloved.

maybe it was just a rainy day. maybe it was just nature. but maybe it needed to rain for me. maybe it was my bravery. maybe i was heard. maybe it was grace.

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3 thoughts on “the day grace rained.

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